As a frustrated perfectionist, this Gospel reading is hard. Really hard. I get all lost in perfectionism, the attempt to be as perfect as a perfectly imperfect human being can be. My own hang-ups get in my way, and perfectionism becomes procrastination, because why do it if I can’t do it perfectly? Perfectionism becomes judgment as I justify my shortcomings by putting others on a scale of more or less perfect than me. Perfectionism becomes anger at myself for not being better and anger at others because I am comparing…It is a vicious and negative and never-ending circle. 

So, let’s step outside the circle. What is Jesus asking of us? 

Love everyone. Period. End of sentence. 

Not just those we like. Not just those who live in houses like ours. Not just our family. Not just our local community. When we love everyone, there should be no visible difference in how we treat people. If you wouldn’t talk like that to your priest, you probably shouldn’t talk like that to anyone else. If you wouldn’t treat your brother that way, you probably shouldn’t treat anyone else that way. Just as the sun rises on the good and the bad, we are to be the reflection of the Son on all we meet. 

A theme for me lately has been to simply keep my focus on being me and let God be God. He hasn’t asked me to sort the wheat from the chaff. He didn’t tell me to designate the goats to one side and the sheep to another. That isn’t my job. My job is to get to heaven to be with Him and to bring as many people with me as possible. 

How do I do that? I start by praying for them. I start by acting like a child of God and seeing with Jesus’s eyes and loving with Jesus’s heart. Who is my example? Mary. Mary is our advocate. An advocate is one who brings your case before the judge. So when I am hurt or angry, my only task is to give the person, the situation, whatever is eating at me, over to Mary and let her bring it before the Judge. I don’t need to do anything else. That is how I behave as a child of God and can go back to acting in love. 

Little by little, by giving over my imperfect feelings, my heart is freed up for more and more of God’s grace. When I am filled with grace, that is the closest I can come to perfection. Blessed Mother, help us to turn to you always, our Mother, our Advocate, our Model. Amen.

Contact the author