Ten years ago today my Dad died. My Mom has been lost in the darkness without him as a guiding light after their amazing 50 year journey together as husband and wife. She has been forced to make changes in her life. It has not been an easy transition for her or my sisters, me, and our families.

St. John of the Cross, born Juan de Yepes y Álvarez, was a contemplative Discalced Carmalite priest, monk and doctor of the Church. He felt a call to reform the Carmalite order and received approval from the Papal Nuncio in Spain to do just that. The changes did not go over well with many of his fellow monks. They imprisoned John for eight and a half months, placing him in a tiny cell with no window. The only light he had to pray his breviary came from the hole in the wall to the room next door.

During this time St. John wrote “The Dark Night of the Soul”. Here is a contemporary paraphrase from Fr. Richard Conlin of the necessity of dark night in spiritual life.

“Until a soul is placed by God in the passive purgation of that dark night… it cannot purify itself completely from these imperfections nor from the others.… No matter how much an individual does through his own efforts, he cannot actively purify himself enough to be disposed in the least degree for the divine union of the perfection of love. God must take over and purge him in that fire that is dark for him.” 

Jesus tells the parable of the son who went back and did the work he was supposed to do but first said no to his father. The son changed his mind. He did his work in the vineyard. He did what he was called to do by his father.

My father told his daughters to care for his wife and our mother. We wholeheartedly agreed to the task. My Mom however does not believe she needs any assistance at this stage in her life. She does not see a beloved mother who has become reclusive and remiss in necessary tasks and personal care. She pushes away inquiries or offers of help, as she is ‘just fine.’

Zephaniah reminds us to take refuge in the Lord. ‘You need not be ashamed of all your deeds…’ Correction or insight from another can point the way to enlightenment. Each person must acknowledge the correction and make a choice to do what is right in the eyes of God. Everyone has a dark time (or more) to work through, even chief priests, monks, moms, and especially me. We each must commit to do what the Father has called us to, our own individual specific tasks.

Father, help me through the darkness. Enlighten my mind to the tasks and changes that need to be made in my life to the hope found in Your love. Amen.

Contact the author

Beth Price is part of the customer care team at Diocesan. She is a Secular Franciscan (OFS) and a practicing spiritual director. Beth shares smiles, prayers, laughter, a listening ear and her heart with all of creation. Reach her here bprice@diocesan.com.

Feature Image Credit: M. Marlowe, https://unsplash.com/photos/My4whL2BBVg

Daily Reading

 

Saint of the Day

 

St. Bernardine of Siena

St. Bernardine of Siena

Feast date: May 20
The Catholic Church honors St. Bernardine of Siena on May 20. A Franciscan friar and preacher, St. Bernardine is known as “the Apostle of Italy” for his efforts to revive the country’s Catholic faith during the 15th century.Bernardine Albizeschi was born to upper-class parents in the Italian republic of Siena during 1380. Misfortune soon entered the boy’s life when he lost his mother at age three and his father four years later. His aunt Diana cared for him afterward, and taught him to seek consolation and security by trusting in God. Even at a young age, Bernardine demonstrated a remarkable concern for the poor as an outgrowth of his love for God. Having become accustomed to fasting, he preferred at times to go without any food in order to help someone in greater need. From the ages of 11 to 17 he focused on his studies, developing the eloquence and dedication that would serve his future work as an evangelist. Before becoming a preacher, however, Bernardine spent several years ministering to the sick and dying. He enrolled in a religious association that served at a hospital in the town of Scala, and applied himself to this work from 1397 to 1400. During that time, a severe plague broke out in Siena, causing a crisis that would eventually lead to the young man taking charge of the entire hospital. Inside its walls, up to 20 people were dying each day from an illness that also killed many of the hospital workers. The staff was decimated and new victims were coming in constantly.Bernardine persuaded 12 young men to help him continue the work of the hospital, which he took over for a period of four months. Although the plague did not infect him, the exhausting work left him weak and he contracted a different sickness that kept him in bed for four months. After recovering, he spent over a year caring for his aunt Bartholomaea before her death. Then the 22-year-old Bernardine moved to a small house outside the city, where he began to discern God’s will for his future through prayer and fasting. He eventually chose to join the Franciscans of the Strict Observance in 1403, embracing an austere life focused on poverty and humility. During this time, while praying before a crucifix, Bernardine heard Christ say to him: “My son, behold me hanging upon a cross. If you love me, or desire to imitate me, be also fastened naked to your cross and follow me. Thus you will assuredly find me.” After Bernardine was ordained a priest, his superiors commissioned him to preach as a missionary to the Italians who were falling away from their Catholic faith. The Dominican evangelist St. Vincent Ferrer, just before leaving Italy, preached a sermon in which he predicted that one of his listeners would continue his work among the Italians –  a prophecy Bernardine heard in person, and went on to fulfill.Bernardine’s personal devotion to God, which amazed even the strict Franciscans, made his preaching extremely effective. He moved his hearers to abandon their vices, turn back to God, and make peace with one another. He promoted devotion to the name of Jesus as a simple and effective means of recalling God’s love at all times. When other priests consulted him for advice, Bernardine gave them a simple rule: “In all your actions, seek in the first place the kingdom of God and his glory. Direct all you do purely to his honor. Persevere in brotherly charity, and practice first all that you desire to teach others.”“By this means,” he said, “the Holy Spirit will be your master, and will give you such wisdom and such a tongue that no adversary will be able to stand against you.” Bernardine’s own life attested to this source of strength in the face of trials. He patiently suffered an accusation of heresy –  which Pope Martin V judged to be false – and refused to abandon his bold preaching when a nobleman threatened him with death.But Bernardine was also widely admired throughout Italy, and he was offered the office of a bishop on three occasions. Each time, however, he turned down the position, choosing to fulfill the prediction of St. Vincent Ferrer through his missionary work. Bernardine preached throughout most of Italy several times over, and even managed to reconcile members of its warring political factions. Later in his life, Bernardine served for five years as the Vicar General for his Franciscan order, and revived the practice of its strict rule of life. Then in 1444, forty years after he first entered religious life, Bernardine became sick while traveling. He continued to preach, but soon lost his strength and his voice. St. Bernardine of Siena died on May 20, 1444. Only six years later, in 1450, Pope Nicholas V canonized him as a saint.